radiant fracture

Still night when I left the house this morning. Half a moon and red stars. Then a red paper lantern, shape of a star, in a high window. From the upper window of the bus, below instead of above, gas station sign showing 999.9.

This early the rabbits are still all over the road. Today the small black ones that always make me think of Blackavar.

There are some beautiful rabbits this year. Some black-brindle ones, like tortoiseshell cats, and some lovely fawn-coloured ones with black points, like dun bays or siamese cats.

Fantastic weariness these last few days. I think -- lack of coffee? My body has jury-rigged all these little alarums for me. Too much caffeine means palpitations. I've been using it to make the machinery go each day, my liquid talisman that I'll have something interesting to say in class. I will have to be dull and of even heartbeat.

The prof got quite angry on Friday. Students had been challenging him on his grading. He spent the class detailing the grading system. Smiling with anger. It makes me uneasy, this vulnerability in professors. Perfectly fair, but I want us not to be able to hurt them. It's as though you could hurt the feelings of knowledge itself.

{rf}